Metsän Tyttö
Nov. 25th, 2005 11:23 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
lenora_roseThis is weird.
In one of my odder avoiding working on the novel moments, I re-opened a lyric I cut from an older draft, and found myself editing it. Well, I'[ve been wanting to put up a writing sample, good or bad, for a while.
It's odd because the lyric was born by pretending I was translating a Finnish (okay, Karelian) song whose tune and mood suited the scene. It reads to me a lot like a translation, which among other things, is why it simultaneously feels to me like it has a rigid shape, even though it's free verse.
Of course, the lyrics here bear no resemblance to the original song or its themes, except that the song is called "Forest Maiden."
Rejoice, bright Forest Spirit
Bright as fire is the hair above your brow
Brighter than fire is the whiteness of your arm
Quicker than dancing flame are your limbs
Dance in the heart of the wood;
Dance your brightness under dappling leaf
Lift your feet across the moss-loam
Move swift through fern to seek the shade.
Seek the grace of Sywela shade
Seek the tallest tree, the greatest tree
The elder mother of the wild wood.
Step light about Her in warding pattern.
Ward the wilds from the flames
Guard the forest from blackest smoke
Ward the mother from ember smouldering
Smother the murderous sparks in your steps
Guard us from the jealous flame
Jealous is fire of your fiery semblance
Jealous too of the green life of the wood
It would turn green bough to grey ash
Be the living flame in the wood
Be the flame that warms without burning
The flame that wards trees from burning
That we may rejoice fearless at your dance.
In one of my odder avoiding working on the novel moments, I re-opened a lyric I cut from an older draft, and found myself editing it. Well, I'[ve been wanting to put up a writing sample, good or bad, for a while.
It's odd because the lyric was born by pretending I was translating a Finnish (okay, Karelian) song whose tune and mood suited the scene. It reads to me a lot like a translation, which among other things, is why it simultaneously feels to me like it has a rigid shape, even though it's free verse.
Of course, the lyrics here bear no resemblance to the original song or its themes, except that the song is called "Forest Maiden."
Rejoice, bright Forest Spirit
Bright as fire is the hair above your brow
Brighter than fire is the whiteness of your arm
Quicker than dancing flame are your limbs
Dance in the heart of the wood;
Dance your brightness under dappling leaf
Lift your feet across the moss-loam
Move swift through fern to seek the shade.
Seek the grace of Sywela shade
Seek the tallest tree, the greatest tree
The elder mother of the wild wood.
Step light about Her in warding pattern.
Ward the wilds from the flames
Guard the forest from blackest smoke
Ward the mother from ember smouldering
Smother the murderous sparks in your steps
Guard us from the jealous flame
Jealous is fire of your fiery semblance
Jealous too of the green life of the wood
It would turn green bough to grey ash
Be the living flame in the wood
Be the flame that warms without burning
The flame that wards trees from burning
That we may rejoice fearless at your dance.
