Apparently, I'm flinching.
Sep. 28th, 2009 01:09 am![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
lenora_roseIn archery, sometimes, when you make too bad a shot, your next several arrows also suffer as you try to regain equilibrium. Technique gets extra sloppy again. I call this flinching.
Once in a while, this also happens after an especially good shot. You flinch because you know you can't repeat that.
However, in writing, you can be having both at once. I just wrote through an emotionally wrenching scene.
Then I rewrote it, because the first was sloppy technique, and therefore read as emotionally stale, and I knew it as i did it.
The second time through, I was deep in that zone. Poor Colin tried to talk to me and got snarled at. It all went right; it did what it needed to do. And because the scene was doing what it needed to do, and being horrific for the characters living it, even as I think it became much better technically, and hit the mark dead on, it hurt like F*** to write.
So today, Having got to the point of writing the rather easier stuff in the next chapter, it's a bit of a fight getting words down. Some of this is that there's exposition happening, and that's a personal weak spot, so I get hyper-aware of bad technique.
Some of it is that I'm expecting the writing to hurt again. So, between knowing I can't hit the good technique high, and due to having too recently hit the emotional low, I'm flinching.
I've got to stop that.
((Thus, I ran off and read some Shadow Unit, of which I am like half a season behind, a week before the season ender. because my own writing isn't wrenching enough. OTOH, what happens to those characters isn't getting filtered through me.)
Once in a while, this also happens after an especially good shot. You flinch because you know you can't repeat that.
However, in writing, you can be having both at once. I just wrote through an emotionally wrenching scene.
Then I rewrote it, because the first was sloppy technique, and therefore read as emotionally stale, and I knew it as i did it.
The second time through, I was deep in that zone. Poor Colin tried to talk to me and got snarled at. It all went right; it did what it needed to do. And because the scene was doing what it needed to do, and being horrific for the characters living it, even as I think it became much better technically, and hit the mark dead on, it hurt like F*** to write.
So today, Having got to the point of writing the rather easier stuff in the next chapter, it's a bit of a fight getting words down. Some of this is that there's exposition happening, and that's a personal weak spot, so I get hyper-aware of bad technique.
Some of it is that I'm expecting the writing to hurt again. So, between knowing I can't hit the good technique high, and due to having too recently hit the emotional low, I'm flinching.
I've got to stop that.
((Thus, I ran off and read some Shadow Unit, of which I am like half a season behind, a week before the season ender. because my own writing isn't wrenching enough. OTOH, what happens to those characters isn't getting filtered through me.)
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Date: 2009-09-28 12:43 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2009-09-28 09:24 pm (UTC)It also helps that pieces of what's coming up were already written by me a few weeks back, out of order.